Every Sunday, Arti Kashyap-Aynsley drops by to discuss all the many things we may be facing, feeling or going through with our daily life transformations. Share your questions and / or requests for topics with Arti anonymously at email@example.com.
Sometimes it is just hard, downright hard to feel inspired, fulfilled and overjoyed at the way you spend your days. I mean in essence you love what you do, but sometimes that joy just gets completely sucked out of you.
Trust me I know.
For months I have been feeling drained in a day job that brings me so much fulfilment. The politics of a large corporate, the changes that raise egos to another level and the uncertainty that comes with being one of the last on the totem poll to hear your fate. It all has gotten to be a bit much. So much so that there are days I question whether this one piece should continue to be part of the portfolio career life that I love so much.
But in the midst of all the questions in my head someone reminded me of something this week that links back to the belief system that continues to keep me on my toes.
Big Magic. And no, I don’t mean some massive universal law.
But instead the theory that sits behind a book that single handily changed my life and way of thinking. The theory in the book suggests that often times we start to hate or loathe the things that leave us feeling the most fulfilled or creative because we have placed so much pressure on the outcomes, we expect vs. just being lost in what brings us so much joy, you know following the creativity and / or passion that we have with out this view of getting to this end goal.
I mean it is so great to have goals, visions and dreams. But sometimes we just need to relieve some of that pressure that we put on ourselves to allow us the freedom and space to just enjoy the moments we are in and the fact that we can spend so much of our energy in something that brings us so much joy.
Take for example this, a colleague of mine who as a kid was asked by her dad to draw the most innovative car she could think of. She spent days and weeks drawing this car, thinking of every last detail. And when she was done, she gave it to her dad with out knowing what he was going to do with it. A couple months later he went to her to tell her that her most innovative car had been selected by a very large and well-known car manufacturer to be designed. Within what felt like minutes she was transferred to this manufacturer’s head office being treated to the best kind of royalty any kid could imagine – unlimited sweets, chocolates and soda.
Reflect on that for a moment and wonder if she had been told what was being done with her drawing if she would have had the same outcome? She may have, but even she will say that by having the space to just do, made her feel that much more energised and focused.
I know it isn’t easy to always be in this state of not thinking about our goals. We focus on outcomes and feel stressed and pressured by them because we care – which is a good thing. But we need to know that it is okay sometimes to allow ourselves spaces to be curious and know that the outcomes we want may not be the ones that are intended for us and that there may be another even better and bigger path that we won’t see unless we just allow ourselves to let go and be curious.
This week or ever if you are feeling and / or finding yourself drained and / or lacking inspiration. Ask yourself why? Why are you feeling what you are feeling? And then see what comes to you, hear what your mind and your gut are saying and allow yourself the space to dig into what may be causing it and what else you may need to explore as a result.
As I sign I off this week I just want to say to all you London Marathon runners out there, congratulations on such a great achievement and your afternoon of taking in such an incredible city.
Suggested resources that may support you on your journey and that helped inspire my mode of thinking and coaching around this are:
- Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert
- Jay Shetty's On Purpose Podcast, Episode 10
I know that it isn’t always easy to take your foot off the gas and to explore questions like this. Trust me this is what the last few months have really felt like for me and I have had to come up with mantra’s and lists that remind me of the bigger picture and the importance of being curious. If you are struggling and / or want to continue the conversation please contact me on Instagram at either @the_wellness_chief or @ladieswholaunch_
Also have a topic you want me to address in the weekly column and / or are looking to explore the idea of coaching or keen to know a bit more about how a coach could support you? I would love to discuss and hear from you, so please drop me a note at firstname.lastname@example.org and remember, all emails are treated as confidential.